NAWILIWILI — The Rev. Al Miles, senior chaplain with Pacific Health Ministry, has written four books and presented hundreds of talks throughout the U.S. on intimate-partner violence, sexual assault and teen dating and child-sexual-abuse awareness. His primary audience has been
NAWILIWILI — The Rev. Al Miles, senior chaplain with Pacific Health Ministry, has written four books and presented hundreds of talks throughout the U.S. on intimate-partner violence, sexual assault and teen dating and child-sexual-abuse awareness.
His primary audience has been religious leaders and lay congregation members.
“My greatest challenges have been getting male spiritual leaders to attend and remain at these talks,” Miles said.
His struggle is often just getting these individuals to believe intimate-partner violence occurs where they serve and worship, and that spiritual leaders need to partner with existing service-providers in their communities, he said.
The Kaua‘i Domestic Violence Prevention Task Force’s training conference in July gave Miles hope when 48 Kaua‘i spiritual leaders and laity chose to take on this challenging issue by spending the day at a domestic-violence-awareness conference at the Kaua‘i Marriott Resort & Beach Club.
Miles was impressed at how both male and female spiritual leaders allowed themselves to be vulnerable, by participating in role-playing and acknowledging that they have yet to acquire the needed education and training to assist victims and survivors, he said.
Miles defined domestic violence as “a pattern of abusive behavior in which a person uses coercion, deception, harassment, humiliation, manipulation or force to establish and maintain power over an intimate partner or former partner.”
Women of faith often turn to their faith communities for refuge so pastors are positioned to be among the “first responders.” Among steps offered by Miles were for pastors to make the safety of a victim-survivor and her children top priority; hold the abuser accountable; and help the victim-survivor establish a safety plan.
Breakout groups explored stereotypes often associated with victims and perpetrators of domestic violence. The predominant characteristic of batterers is that they are overwhelmingly male. The primary characteristic of victims is that they are female.
Pohai Kirkland, chair of the task force’s faith sub-committee and event organizer, called the gathering “historic.” It was a first for Kaua‘i, bringing together leadership from different faiths to learn how they can help.
“Because of this conference I have a renewed commitment to caring communication and outreach to all our faith communities, to bring more effectiveness to our Domestic Violence Prevention Task Force and move us all toward our shared desire to end all violent crimes against women,” Kirkland said.
“The best hope we have for dealing with this affront to society is to work together. The men and women serving on Kaua‘i took a major step in the right direction by coming together to address this issue,” said Miles.
Miles is senior chaplain at The Queen’s Medical Center in Honolulu.
Kirkland may be reached at 345-3148 or pohaikalani@aol.com.
The 24-hour YWCA domestic-violence-crisis line is 245-6362.
• Linda Pizzitola is coordinator for the Kaua‘i Domestic Violence Prevention Task Force.
