• Remembering Linda • Accept your fate • Right to pursue happiness Remembering Linda There is a principle in behavioral science called “unconditional positive regard.” It means one learns to separate an undesirable behavior from the perceived character of the
• Remembering Linda • Accept your fate • Right to pursue happiness
Remembering Linda
There is a principle in behavioral science called “unconditional positive regard.” It means one learns to separate an undesirable behavior from the perceived character of the client. It is emphasized in professional training, but not all professionals, or paraprofessionals, “get it.”
Linda Pasadava, however, not only “got it” but epitomized it. Few knew that she had taken on a position of paraprofessional/skills trainer working with autistic children, both in the classroom and home. As a behavioral specialist, I was honored to help train her in that classroom. I never heard a cross word from her even in the most trying circumstances.
She did the work not for the money, but because it mattered in a very fundamental way. She was a valued, respected, and dedicated member of an exceptional team in Mr. Kline’s preschool classroom, and we were devastated to hear of her passing while in India.
If only we had many more individuals like Linda in our community, we might also find a stronger and more peaceful island ‘ohana. I will not be able to be at the memorial, and did not want this last of her honorable efforts to go unacknowledged.
Elaine Albertson, Waimea
Accept your fate
So let me get this straight. Certain unfortunate individuals are born to, environmentally programmed for, or by choice, desire to have sex, intimate relations, and long term companionship with members of their own sex.
This of course is an aberration created by faulty DNA, an unfortunate childhood environment, or a conscious decision to embark on this journey at the expense of one’s own potential posterity. Because of this aberration, valuable members of society who are gay have been shunned by society because the very preservation of society itself critically depends on procreation, and without it society/mankind would become extinct. That’s extinct, kind of like the Dodo bird.
These individuals are called homosexuals in scientific terms but didn’t like that name so they creatively adopted the word “gay” which means lighthearted and carefree, because it sounds better. For the past few years these gay members of society have decided there’s no difference between their relationships and those 3,000-year-old relationships society has found through trial and error to fulfill procreation and child rearing in a safe and efficiently administered institution.
The literal definition of the word “marriage” is “the legal union of a man and a woman in order to live together and often have children.” So our gay brothers and sisters want to again adopt, redefine, alter, or otherwise change the definition of a word, this time “marriage,” so they can establish their rights and find happiness as “lighthearted and carefree married people.” Be careful what you wish for here!
Conclusion: Most love you and want you to have many of the same civil rights and benefits of a married couple, but forget about stealing a word from a society that exists entirely because the definition is fine the way it is. Come up with your own clever, descriptive word that contains the appropriate rights and privileges of the current definition of a “marriage.”
Accept your fate and let us help you fight for your rights without conveniently changing a well established definition that has been understood, revered, protected, and practiced by society for centuries. Unfortunately your life’s circumstance leads to posterity genocide, not perpetuation, and just doesn’t fit the institution of marriage definition society has functioned under for a very long time. You and “God” wouldn’t want the same unfortunate “aberration” for the rest of us, right?
Though society is saddened by your circumstance it would be catastrophic if it were to be burdened by your fate. Instead of stealing yet another word from the established English language let’s come up with something that more accurately describes the reality of your particular needs.
Gordon Oswald, Kapa‘a
Right to pursue happiness
Dec. 7, 1956, that is the date that David first met Gail. And for 51 years they built a life together.
In October 2008 Gail passed away leaving David to finish life’s journey alone. “It doesn’t matter,” “They want special treatment,” “Marriage can only be between a man and a woman” are just a few of the cries from opponents to HB444.
Upon the death of Gail, just a couple of the consequences of not being legally recognized included an inheritance tax of $125,000 and separate burial as their ashes could not go into the same niche at the veterans cemetery. For all those who say it doesn’t matter, I say, Yes, it does matter.
David retired from the Army after 30-plus years of service. Service personnel who share same sex affection are serving to stop the unfair domination of the Taliban who wish to impose their religious beliefs on others.
I fear that we have our own religious right that will not be satisfied until they control the beliefs of everyone. And no I am not anti religious, as a former United Methodist minister, I support the right of everyone to follow their personal beliefs. I do not support the domination of others with those beliefs. Our gay and lesbian brothers and sisters deserve the right to the pursuit of happiness just as much as the rest of the citizens of Hawai‘i and the U.S. do.
Doran Porter, Kane‘ohe
