Editor’s note: In a fron-tpage article recently, noted Hawai‘i anti-drug speaker and advocate Gary Shimabukuro expressed his wish for more peer drug-prevention programs among Hawai‘i’s youth. Following is a personal account of one former teen ice addict working towards the
Editor’s note: In a fron-tpage article recently, noted Hawai‘i anti-drug speaker and advocate Gary Shimabukuro expressed his wish for more peer drug-prevention programs among Hawai‘i’s youth. Following is a personal account of one former teen ice addict working towards the same vision. Due to legal constraints, careful consideration has been taken to protect her identity. She is a public-school student on Kaua‘i whose identity is known to the writer and editors.
LIHU‘E — After five depredating years of being victimized by severe ice (crystal methamphetamine) addiction, 16-year-old Lani Jones (not her real name) is finally gaining control of her life, by realizing her dreams of sobriety and pushing her own youth drug-prevention plan.
Although the road to recovery for the former teen addict has not been a welcoming one, Jones continues to forge ahead, armed with the valiant hope that sharing her horrific experience through discussion and slide-show seminars at schools will prevent the unnecessary suffering of Kaua‘i youth who may be eager to experiment with the dangerous drug, she said.
“I want to be able to talk to my peers, especially those of the younger generation,” declared Jones. “I, myself, got an early start with the drug, and do not want them to have to go through what I went through.”
Jones first began her bout with ice as an elementary student at the tender age of 11. “I first got into drugs because of my surroundings and the neighborhood I was living in,” recalled Jones.
“A few people used ice like it was no big deal, and it just so happened that an older individual offered me the drug. I had heard about it before, and knew that trying it was wrong, but I did it anyway, out of curiosity.”
According to Jones, the subject of ice and its consequences was a closed topic at home. “My parents had never discussed ice or drugs or any of those other harmful substances,” asserts Jones. “I guess they weren’t comfortable talking about it, or just never suspected that I would ever be caught doing it.
“But even if they were to try and lecture me about ice and other types of drugs, I highly doubt that I would have listened to them anyway,” she said.
“After all, I was pretty rebellious back then, and whatever they had to say, I wouldn’t want to listen to it. I just wanted to learn from my mistakes on my own.”
And it was her parents’ obliviousness to her mounting addiction which kept them in the dark about her problem for years. “It took awhile before they realized what was going on, like about five or six years” said Jones.
“They saw what I was going through, as far as the physical and emotional effects, and my constant absence from school. But still, it took them awhile before they confronted me about their suspicions.”
Shortly after that confrontation, she began her mutinous streak. Jones remembers being kept on a “short leash” by her parents and teachers. “They would give me these forms everyday which required my teacher’s signature, just to make sure that I was attending classes. It was pretty silly,” she said.
“My parents would drop me off at school, I would forge my teacher’s signature, leave campus to smoke ice, and then return just in time for them to pick me up.”
Obviously, her brilliant plan did not prosper, and neither did her luck.
“Throughout the course of my drug addiction, I had some downfalls, phases where I would be depressed and down for days, and I was on the run for nearly two years,” said Jones.
“At the beginning of March last year, I even landed in the hospital for a week. I swore to myself that I would never use ice again, but as soon as I got out, I did it again, in hopes that it would take away my personal problems,” she said.
“At that time, I was also involved in several physically and verbally abusive relationships, and got arrested a few times for running away from home.”
After being imprisoned for two months, Jones was finally admitted into an O‘ahu drug-rehabilitation facility in November of last year. But obstacles on the path to cleanliness maintained their relentless ferocity.
“The first time I went into treatment, I couldn’t handle the stress, and thought it was BS. I needed to bail, and took the chance a month later.”
Unable to be contained, Jones broke free from her place of confinement, and headed straight for freedom, unaware that a personal sanctum would intervene.
“As soon as I broke out of the treatment center I caught a bus to Waikiki, just to get away from it all. The funny thing was, I didn’t smoke ice,” she said.
“I easily could have, but I chose not to. It was truly the first time since my addiction began that I was able to say ‘no,’” she continued.
“For once I felt a bit empowered, knowing that I had the choice and the will to just quit, even though for the most part I felt frantic and insecure.”
With a sliver of newfound faith and the ability to put the past behind her, Jones called her aunty in ‘Ewa Beach, and asked her to come and pick her up.
“Although I was glad to have been rescued and given another chance, I was still bitter. I didn’t want to talk to anyone,” she said. “It took me awhile before I actually made the effort to go back to rehab and stick with it.”
Determined to get her life back on track, Jones took advantage of her golden opportunity and, with the support of her family and friends, enrolled in a 12-step program for drug addicts. While her restless nature nearly sent her on the verge of a runaway repeat, experience proved influential, and she “did what she had to do,” taking the rehabilitation process “one step at a time.” On May 22 of this year, Jones successfully graduated from the 12-step program.
Since completing the program, Jones has been keeping herself busy. “I spend a lot of my time attending daily 12-step meetings and sharing my experiences with other addicts. It gives me a sense of relief and counseling.
“I also spend a lot of time with my family, hanging out with my sisters and nieces,” she said. “I love them very much, and am very grateful for them.”
The Kapa‘a senior to-be is also attending summer school to rack up additional school credit, and refrains from parties.
“I’ll admit, it’s hard to not go to parties and ragers when all of your friends go, but I know that it’s not worth it. I’d rather just stay home and spend time with my family,” she said. “Luckily, though, my parents are trying to rebuild their trust in me, so they let me go out, in the hopes that I have learned my lesson. And I have.”
- Taren Fujimoto, editorial assistant, may be reached at ta_ren_ren@lycos.com.
