New support group focuses on help for families LIHU’E — “Permanency” becomes a special word and important concept for families that include foster children, adopted children and young ones under the wings of guardians. It means, hopefully, the end of
New support group focuses on help for families
LIHU’E — “Permanency” becomes a special word and important concept for families that include foster children, adopted children and young ones under the wings of guardians.
It means, hopefully, the end of being shuffled from one family to another. It is, ideally, the final stop, a permanent home.
Families, the state Department of Human Services (DHS), the private Child and Family Service, and other public and private agencies have come to realize that families in the post-permanency category need real support and haven’t always gotten it.
“You kind of go through it alone,” said Lucy Douthitt, who as a DHS worker and adoptive mother knows of what she speaks.
Her son, now 12, and Douthitt “adopted each other” a decade ago. She said they could have benefited from a support group by sharing her experiences and feelings “before, during and after adoption. Post-adoptive needs have been a bit neglected,” she said.
Statewide, that is changing. Locally, the Kaua’i Adoption Support Group is mobilizing to provide the kind of support Douthitt could have used 10 years ago.
“Our main goal is to support and educate families that have adopted children, families with guardianship, and welcoming families that are interested in adopting,” said Pam Smith-Chock, group facilitator.
A free dinner to introduce the group and its goals is set for Wednesday at the Radisson Kaua’i Beach Resort.
Douthitt hopes the group will be able to impress upon adopted children that they are not one of a kind, but one of many.
“It’s amazing how many people are adopted” on Kaua’i, said Smith-Chock, who has adopted twin daughters. “It’s all around us.”
Statewide, there are around 200 children available for adoption, explained Dr. Steven R. Perry, Child and Family Service program director. The private agency was awarded a state contract to facilitate adoption support groups statewide, and part of the focus is on offering post-adoptive services.
Henry and Terry Lange of Lihu’e are foster parents who have taken guardianship of some children who started out as their foster children. They have some experience in the adoption field, as well. They’re part of the support group for their own benefit and because they saw a need for it.
It can be a struggle to adopt children in Hawai’i, and people going through the experience don’t have to go through it alone, Smith-Chock said during a meeting of the group last week at the Child and Family Service office on the second floor of the St. Michael and All Angels’ Episcopal Church in Lihu`e.
Cheryl Ringler is the mother of a daughter she adopted from Korea, and she has childless friends on Kaua’i she is trying to recruit to become adoptive parents.
Alice Morikawa has raised her grandson since he was 5 through informal adoption, or hanai. She has received help from the Queen Lili’uokalani Children’s Center grandparents’ support group, founded in 1995 for grandparents who have hanaied their grandchildren.
During last week’s meeting, the need to meet the needs of the triad involved in adoption matters — the adoptive parents, adopted children and their birth parents — was stressed by all who attended.
At this Wednesday’s dinner meeting, some of the group’s members will share their experiences of adoption and discuss plans for the group’s first year of activities, Smith-Chock said.
Daniel Leong, a Child and Family Service administrator and director of post-adoptive services on O’ahu, will be the guest speaker. He is an adoptive father, and his wife is adopted.
Those interested in becoming adoptive parents, Douthitt explained, can start by getting a free home study guide available through DHS.
Part of the new support group’s goal is to remove negative stigmas attached to adoption.
“We’re going to make a difference, hopefully, in our little community,” said Smith-Chock.
The group will also network with the Hawai’i Adoption Permanency Alliance, which has several groups active on O’ahu.
A Web site, www.adoptionhawaii.com, has additional information.
Federal legislation offering $10,000 tax credits to adoptive families, and making it easier to adopt children across state lines, is moving in Congress, Perry and Smith-Chock said.
All welcome at dinner
The free dinner this Wednesday to introduce the Kaua`i Adoption Support Group is scheduled for 6 p.m. at the Radisson Kaua`i Beach Resort in the Jasmine Ballroom. The RSVP deadline was last Friday, but Pam Smith-Chock, group facilitator, said no one who wants to attend will be turned away. Additional information is available at 245-5914 weekdays during regular business hours or 245-1699 nights.
Music for the dinner will be provided by Robbie Kaholokula, and free childcare will be offered, as well.
Staff Writer Paul C. Curtis can be reached at mailto:pcurtis@pulitzer.net or 245-3681 (ext. 224).
