Letter for Sunday, August 4, 2019

Mainlanders ruining Kauai with their attitudes

I have lived here almost 35 years and was honored that I was allowed to live here and learn the culture and the people. I learned back then what aloha spirit truly was. It was kindness, thoughtfulness, thinking of others before yourself, and thinking how what you did may impact your neighbors and community.

But back then there were an equal amount of cultures here, so no one dominated the rules. Everyone played fair and equal. Now we have a majority of mainland people moving here.

The people moving here now say things like, “We don’t want your culture, your traditions, your history, we just want your land and we want locals out.” And in the stores, they are so rude and demeaning to local people, they treat them like they are third-class citizens. Stop acting like you’re in some Third-World country. This is not a foreign country, this is still part of America, and these are not lowly peasants you are talking to. So how are you supposed to have aloha spirit for people with that kind of attitude?

And the poor visitors who come here don’t know what to think. I see visitors who have the best attitude and manners to others, and then we have visitors and homeless transients coming here and saying that they want to cut in line in front of you, or asking for money — not food — just money, and having them all say “WHERE IS YOUR ALOHA SPIRIT?”

Like I am supposed to let rude, arrogant, entitled people make me feel guilty if I don’t let them have what they want. I really do like to be kind to people. It makes my day. But I will not be forced to be kind to people who assume that this is some local law that we have to put up with this being thrown in our faces as an obligation to them.

And it is appalling that the visitors bureau pushes our aloha spirit so much. The mainland has aloha spirit all over the place — they just call it by other names — kindness, thoughtfulness and thinking of others before yourself.

So don’t come here with this entitled attitude. Instead, come with the attitude of you showing us your kindness, your thoughtfulness to others. Some people will still come here with the thinking that they can do whatever they want and it’s allowed because we have aloha spirit. Well, get this — aloha spirit is optional, not mandatory.

Debi Dill, Kapaa

  1. My Two Cents August 4, 2019 5:30 am Reply

    What I don’t like is outsiders that move here a try to change how we live, make up new rules to accommodate them.
    If you don’t like how live ,work and play don’t move here. We did just fine before you got here and we’ll do just fine after you leave

    ALOHA… also means goodbye

    1. Jake August 5, 2019 5:52 am Reply

      “Make up new rules”?? Like what?

      Last I checked, the “Rule Makers”, aka Kauai County Council, were all “Born and Raised” on this rock.

      Don’t like constructive criticism and ways to improve the island??

  2. tunataxi August 4, 2019 8:01 am Reply

    Not sure where on Kauai you live or who you engaging but you must bring it on yourself.”The people moving here now say things like, “We don’t want your culture, your traditions, your history, we just want your land and we want locals out.” ” I’d bet my home that’s a BOLD FACED LIE…. get over yourself. Your letter contradicts every point you try to make. Hypocrite

    1. Jake August 5, 2019 5:56 am Reply

      Agreed. She sounds like a 60s hippie. 35 years would be about right. “We want your land”…..sounds like a movie title.

      1. Eh Brah, I going give you good money for your land... August 5, 2019 7:26 pm Reply

        Much mahalos!

        Mark Zuckerberg

  3. james August 4, 2019 8:22 am Reply

    No one lived here until the first Polynesians arrived in Hawaii in the 3rd century from the Marquesas by travelling in groups of waka, and were followed by Tahitians in AD 1300, who then conquered the original inhabitants. Everyone who has ever lived here came from somewhere else. There are no indigenous people in Hawaii. There are so many cultures here, Polynesian, Portuguese, Filipino, Hispanic, Caucasian, and on and on. You came from somewhere else, albeit 35 years ago. I agree, folks should respect one another, and other cultures. Some people and cultures have been here longer than others. Does that give them some kind of special status or priority? No. As you point out, we are part of the USA and, as such, enjoy all the rights, duties and privileges of all other citizens, whether in Hawaii or elsewhere. If certain individuals fail to respect others, they should be called out. To generalize an entire group as being disrespectful, is wrong. Check your own Aloha spirit.

    1. Jake August 5, 2019 5:59 am Reply

      Bingo. Well said.

    2. Ka'aona Kipuka August 6, 2019 12:42 pm Reply

      blah, blah, blah… congrats!!! you know how to conduct a search on wikipedia…

  4. Makani B. Howard August 4, 2019 9:18 am Reply

    Wow Debi, sounds like you have no idea what Aloha is. I could go on and on, but it will fall on deaf ears.

    I think you are the problem, not others.

    Remember this: Aloha is not something you give only if it is returned.

  5. ruthann jones August 4, 2019 1:12 pm Reply

    note from a bitter haole!

  6. boxers or briefs August 4, 2019 1:18 pm Reply


  7. Jjjames August 4, 2019 11:51 pm Reply

    Debi, Obviously you have a better than average grasp on what “Aloha” really is. Considerably better than most of the bitter a-holes that regularly make all the negative and slanderous comments in this venue.
    Everyone likes to use the word “Aloha” but I think most have forgotten the true meaning, or have never really known the true meaning, or more importantly, have never lived nor felt “Aloha”in their hearts.
    Aloha has become just “giving” and then expecting to be given back. Or helping, and then expecting to be helped in return.

    Many have come to enjoy the “Aloha” spirit. Especially when it results in a convenience for themselves. But most have not learned what it really is.

    I was born and raised right here on Kauai. As were my parents and my grandparents. And that dates back about 140 years.
    “Aloha” was instilled in us at a very young age. By going to church and attending Sunday school. Not necessarily learning about God and religion. But more about learning about people. And about how to treat others.
    We grew up with ALOHA.
    It’s not just a way of life that is learned. It IS absorbed and instilled through generations.
    It becomes part of you and is in your heart without even trying.

    While a big part of the “ALOHA Spirit” is doing things for others without expectations of retribution, an even larger, and more important part of the Aloha Spirit, which seems to have been forgotten, is NOT doing things that may affect the comfort, convenience and emotions of others. It’s called “Consideration”, “Courtesy”, and “Respect”.
    It has come to the point when we have to get laws passed to assure that others are considerate, courteous, and respectful. Barking dog laws; fireplace burning laws; noise ordinance laws; etc. All laws that attempt to enforce the “common sense” issues that should be expected in the “Land of Aloha”.
    Instead, sadly, the ALOHA of today has become a commodity and is, and has been “FOR SALE”.

  8. numilalocal August 5, 2019 5:03 pm Reply

    So complains someone who’s herself a mainland haole transplant.

  9. Ka'aona Kipuka August 8, 2019 8:58 am Reply


Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *


By participating in online discussions you acknowledge that you have agreed to the TERMS OF SERVICE. An insightful discussion of ideas and viewpoints is encouraged, but comments must be civil and in good taste, with no personal attacks. If your comments are inappropriate, you may be banned from posting. To report comments that you believe do not follow our guidelines, send us an email.