LIHU‘E — The 12 women were mostly strangers to each other, but they had one thing in common — Susan. Susan was their friend, their co-worker and their family. Those women were asked to help Susan as she battled cancer.
LIHU‘E — The 12 women were mostly strangers to each other, but they had one thing in common — Susan. Susan was their friend, their co-worker and their family. Those women were asked to help Susan as she battled cancer.
For three-and-a-half years, the 12 women cooked for Susan, ran errands, took her to doctor’s appointments, filled out paperwork and kept track of her medication. They even helped to plan the wedding of Susan’s daughter.
Their goal was to give Susan the help she needed, without overloading the caregivers, which would result in eventual burnout.
This is how Share the Care was born, which has spread to 43 states and 11 countries.
Sheila Warnock, founder of Share the Care and one of Susan’s original caregivers, will be hosting a free presentation of the program from 3 to 4:30 p.m. Sunday at St. Michael and All Angels Episcopal Church in Lihu‘e.
Sunday’s event is sponsored by Kaua‘i Hospice, Kaua‘i Alzheimer’s Association Aloha Chapter and the American Cancer Society.
“The purpose of Sheila coming is to share the model,” Deborah Duda said, author of “Coming Home: A Guide to Dying at Home With Dignity.”
“A major concert or all of us is how to care for people we love when they need extra help,” Duda said. “How do we take care of our own without destroying our health and dissipating our finances?”
The goal of Sunday’s presentation is to generate enough interest to host a free workshop in January, which would teach people how the Share the Care program works and how to organize teams spread around the island.
“Often times, when people help others start these groups, they are always telling me it’s really a life-changing experience, and that it meant so much,” said Warnock. “I think the impact is so profound for each other and every person involved. From the person receiving the help, their family, their caregiver and every single person that joins to help. They become so close and bonded, they make new friends.”
In 1995, Warnock authored a book of the same name, which outlines in detail how to organize a group, plan and run your first meeting and how to maximize the skills and talents of each member of the caregiving group. The book also includes worksheets, exercises and advice on how to avoid burnout and run the group.
“By the end of that first meeting, people realize that their whole attitude has changed from the beginning, because they have a plan to follow,” Warnock said. “They have a system where they rotate responsibilities and they feel a commitment to help their friend.”
On the opposite end, the recipient and family are able to allow the love and care for the recipient sink in, without feeling like they are a burden to others.
Tasks include everything from mapping out doctor’s appointments to organizing medical records, to picking up mail or walking the recipient’s dog.
“Sometimes, a road to a solution to a complex problem is simple,” said Jim Jennings, spiritual care advisor at Kaua‘i Hospice. “We see this as a natural extension of our mission. It would help so many people on the island.”
Members from the Kaua‘i Alzheimer’s Association and American Cancer Society are joining Kaua‘i Hospice at Sunday’s event, but Jennings emphasized Share the Care is not intended to replace these social services, but to knit them together.
“It’s a wonderful adjunct to what we can do in hospice,” he said. “The fascinating thing about this model is that there is a remarkable impetus here. Everyone wants to do a little something.”
With health care programs being cut, and the cost of care rapidly rising, Warnock said it’s imperative that people start planning for the future.
“We have a population of aging baby boomers that will by 2050, and we are not going to have enough professionals to take care of everyone. Globally, we have to start getting back to that place to routinely help each other. One way of doing that is using Share the Care,” Warnock said.
“I just hope we get a lot of people to come to this presentation. Even if you don’t need any help now, everyone is going to be touched at some point. It’s better to think about it now, because you never know.”
For more information, visit www.sharethecare.org or call Duda at 332-7668.
• Andrea Frainier, lifestyle writer, can be reached at 245-3681, ext. 257 or afrainier@ thegardenisland.com.
